The Pros & Cons Of Going Dateless To A Wedding
- Nov 12, 2015
- 4 min read
Nothing reminds you just how single you are like a wedding and another wedding, but there are definitely pros and cons of being dateless.
It seems that in the year I got Ungaged, everyone else in my family got married. I love weddings and I love being single, but seriously, nothing reminds you just how single you are like a wedding, and a shower, and another wedding, and another shower. And then another wedding…
Then, one wedding, I realized, this is awesome! This month, my sister is celebrating her one-year anniversary and I am celebrating the one-year anniversary of loving going stag to a wedding. So, in honor of my sister and her husband, their happy marriage, and their awesome wedding, I’ve brought you the pros and cons of going dateless to a wedding.
CONS
Con #1: Well, you’re dateless. Nothing says “I’m single and alone” like being the only one sitting during “All My Life” by K-Ci & JoJo. Every couple is wrapped in a tight embrace, staring deeply into each other’s eyes like they want to devour each other, and you’re sitting there wondering when you’re going to get some cake.
The Remedy:
Hit the bar. You’ll escape the slightly awkward mushy vibes from the dance floor and chances are there will be a few other people there who are doing the exact same thing. Hello, single dudes. Or better yet, hello, hot bartender.
Con #2: The bouquet toss. You know you dread it. With help from Beyoncé, the DJ announces, “Alright, all the single ladies to the dance floor!” and it’s pretty much all you can do to hide under the table since the entire reception is now looking to you while one of your aunts is dragging you by the arm loudly boasting about all your wonderful qualities. You get to the group of single women, which ends up being you and the flower girl, and you are cursing the bride under your breath because you know she’s launching that thing at you.
The Remedy: Come back from the bar just in time for the garter toss. They have literally just round up all the single men in the room, just for you. Plant yourself in the middle and start taking numbers.
Con #3: The empty seat next to you. Couple, couple, couple you Seating charts weren’t made for odd numbers, so chances are there’s a nice open seat right there next to you for your imaginary date. Either that, or they’ve strategically placed the only other single person in the room next to you hoping to play matchmaker. No thanks.
The Remedy: You know how you try to put your clutch behind you on your seat while you’re eating, but either you or it end up sliding to the floor? Well, problem solved, for you and everyone else at the table. You’re welcome, ladies. And in the off chance you meet some handsome and interesting (non-familial) mystery guest, he can slide right up next to you during K-Ci & JoJo.
PROS
Pro #1: You get to wear what you damn well please. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why men can’t pick out a damn tie. I mean, it’s probably the same reason why I send pictures to my girl friends to help me choose earrings, but still. Sometimes, I don’t want to worry about coordinating with a date. If I want to wear my emerald earrings with my navy dress, then I want to do that and not worry about your pocket scarf. And if I’m in the wedding, I’m already trying to coordinate with a bunch of fabulous ladies. You can pick out your own socks.
Pro #2: You forgo the awkward romantic moments. The only thing more awkward than watching couples during a slow dance, is sitting next to your boyfriend during a toast or the vows. You’re holding hands when the groom mentions how he knew his bride was the one the first time he saw her. Your man squeezes your hand and looks over at you and smiles. You immediately start reading way too far into it. Was that a proposal?! Or, how about if he doesn’t squeeze your hand. Is he breaking up with me?! Yes, it’s irrational, but weddings are emotional!
Pro #3: You can truly celebrate love. My absolute favorite thing about being dateless at a wedding is getting to truly focus on the reason why I’m there; to celebrate the love of the bride and groom. It’s about two people sharing their happiness with their family and friends – not you, or pocket squares, or grilling your date on his body language. Seeing your friend of family member celebrate their happiness with their new spouse renews your faith in finding true love and reminds you that, no, not every relationship ends in heart ache. Now, go put those emotional highs to good use, dance with the hot guy you met during the garter toss, and get that cake to go! (Wink.)
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